Æsc and Œthel

Last Night I had a dream

Don't worry. There weren't any sand or footprints in it.

I dreamed that I had been arrested and taken to prison for a crime I didn't commit (cue A-Team music!)

The thing was it was one of those dreams that was only slightly odd, it didn't completely break reality. It had some logical inconsistencies (the fact that I had an iPhone 4 in prison - I joked with a visitor that it'd be old hat by the time I was released) but there weren't any Cheshire cats or bottles marked 'drink me'. It also certainly wasn't one of those 'from God' dreams of great prophetic import - unless God is trying to tell me something about the iPhone 4.

Where God really spoke to me is after the dream as I lay in the æther of half-sleep I pondered what I had dreamed. Prison was very real to me in this dream. I was pretty terrified. I asked mum to bring some wet-wipes in because I didn't want to shower in prison (although I suspect that in reality nowadays the showers would have separate cubicles - it's not exactly Shawshank these days). No-one would see being sent to prison as a blessing but I pondered how I'd felt and thought this.

No-one would see prison as a blessing. You're shut away from your friends and kept in a small cell for quite a lot of time. Other people determine how you live your life. However God can bless you by sending you to prison. It could be that while in prison someone who is determined to kill you can't get to you or that you are used to bless someone in there who becomes an important part of your life or many other things.

Now lets turn that on its head. Being in a restrictive environment with other people in charge of me could be hugely attractive to me at the moment. My own management of my life has caused me to miss important events, frustrate family and friends, live in an untidy flat and lose multiple jobs. It would be the most amazing thing in the world to delegate. For someone else to appear on the scene and take it all over. "You need a wife" has been frequently said to me by family or friends - as if the sole purpose of having a woman in my life would be as some kind of walking personal organiser, which is why I usually reply "No, I need a PA". It would seem to be a blessing from God if I were to be put in a situation where my freedom was slightly restricted but my life was managed by others. That's not what God is doing in my life at the moment.

So what did I learn from my musings?

We tend to put Blessings in human terms. When we say "God, please bless me" we generally want him to bless us by our own definitions. God wants to bless us but he blesses us in his OWN way. God wants to bless me by putting me in a position of dependence on him not in a position of delegation to others. Part of that will be transforming me by renewing my mind and part of that will be keeping me dependent on him.

Also - never get the latest version of iPhone, you'll save money and it'll only be old hat a few years down the line.

12 Comments

  • Tim Rayner.
    Posted March 15, 2011 at 10:31 pm | Permalink

    And in another beautiful God-incedence my morning musings fitted in with what we were studying tonight in Life Group. About putting God first before anything and having the right motives in prayer.

  • Liz Flewers
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    should enter this into a short story competition, or should that be long story?

  • Timothy Lee Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    Ha ha.

  • Timothy Lee Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    I started a blog because no-one commented on my facebook notes. Then got it to post to notes just in case. Now everyone is commenting on the notes and no-one is commenting on the blog - and the wordpres plugin I added to try and import facebook comments doesn't seem to do its job.

  • Jenny Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    So you're not about to go out and commit a crime then?

  • Timothy Lee Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    Read carefully. I was in prison for a crime I DIDN'T commit.

  • Timothy Lee Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    I started a blog because no-one commented on my facebook notes. Then got it to post to notes just in case. Now everyone is commenting on the notes and no-one is commenting on the blog - and the wordpres plugin I added to try and import facebook comments doesn't seem to do its job.

  • Jenny Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    So you're not about to go out and commit a crime then?

  • Timothy Lee Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    Read carefully. I was in prison for a crime I DIDN'T commit.

  • Kate Phillips
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    ah ha, i have opened it. Looks as tho i will keep nosing back and forth at the different blogs all day 🙂

  • Kate Phillips
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    typical lol

  • Timothy Lee Rayner
    Posted March 16, 2011 at 12:00 am | Permalink

    If you want to see it in all it's bloggy glory it's at aescandoethel.tra.yner.me.uk (or tra.yner.me.uk will also get you there)

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